Today, after playing cards, Alison and I daydreamed about food back home which inspired me to whip out the long forgotten Food I Miss List and make a few delicious additions. Can’t wait to chow down when I get back!
I find myself missing the strangest things, while some others are completely understandable. I miss my family, having dinners with them and movie nights at home with my mom and brother, my dear friends, my church (many aspects, while others not as much), curling up in my nice cozy bed with Jessie nuzzled beside me, spending time with Ben and Jake, hearing their stories and laughter, hot showers with fresh clean clothes to slip into, the produce section at the grocery store, ice-cream and girls nights with my best friends, teasing my dad and laughing with him, many foods and so much more. Yet at the same time, there are things I thought I would miss but in the end, I could really happily live without. Like driving, watching TV, computers and cell phones, shopping (that one was a shock to me), dishwashers, traffic, going out for a night on the town, concerts… mainly things that tend to distract me from God. While these things aren’t necessarily bad things, I have come to realize that I absolutely don’t need them.
It is interesting to me and I wonder, when I get home, will these changes in me stick, or will I fall back into the fast-paced, materialistic, consumer driven lifestyle I once knew? In the end, that is completely within my control. I can’t expect anyone else to make the choice for me, or to even make it an easy choice to make, this one is on me. The last six months have changed me in so many ways, changes for the better and I have a choice whether I let it stick or slide back. I know my choice. Where before I knew I should want it, I now truly desire to take the road less traveled, to live my life for God, for others rather than myself, in pursuit of the Kingdom. I chose that and I know it will require lots of prayer, sacrifice and some suffering but I also know, have intimately experienced the pure, deep, resounding joy that comes from dying to myself, picking up my cross and following Jesus. I can’t turn back now, I see the glory of the kingdom in front of me and I will give my all to bring HIM glory.
